My wedding is 3 1/2 weeks away, and I am so excited and I cannot even begin to explain it, but this morning my excitement is for a difference reason. I am excited for my wedding to get here because then my nightmares will have to stop! My fiance and I have been engaged for about a year and a half, and over that time I have had only one big nightmare about the wedding. My mom has had nightmares, my maid of honor, but not really me. So, of course, being the nice bride-t0-be that I am I have made fun of them (especially my mom) and have thought to myself "I am way to put together for nightmares about the wedding, what could go wrong?" Well, the joke is on me now....
Just in the past week or so I have started having nightmares on a nightly basis. Mainly just little things and at this point I don't even really remember them, but last night, well I will not be forgetting it anytime soon.
For some reason the reoccurring theme in my nightmare is that I can't remember getting married. I usually cue in right after the wedding and realize its over and practically burst into tears because I don't remember the actual ceremony. Usually I end up begging to do it over again so that I can remember. I genuinely feel sorry for people with amnesia because I can barely handle it in my dreams.
So my dream last night starts with me walking into the church sanctuary from the side entrance. I am fully dressed in my wedding dress ready to go. It is not my dad's church where I am getting married and looks more like the church that my fiance's brother got married in. So as I'm walking in all of the groomsmen are lined up at the front of the church (no idea where the bridesmaids are). As I'm walking past them, I realize that none of them match. They have all decided to wear their own dress shirts, most with designs on them, and one has decided he's too cool for his tux jacket and is wearing a pull over sweater with his tux. My mouth about drops and then I realize that the wedding is over. I'm married, and again I remember nothing. I ask if we can do it again, receiving all the usual bizarre looks. Yes, Yes, I'm the bride and I don't remember my wedding! I brush that off and decide to go find my "husband" because for some reason all of the guests are still sitting in the church and I am walking in alone. As I cross the front of the church and all the groomsmen to get to the center aisle I make some smart remark about their outfits to which they all give me dirty looks and cop attitudes. I decide I don't have time for their attitudes and head down the center aisle alone.
As soon as I get out of the sanctuary I see my now "husband" and I run to him and give him a huge hug, suddenly everything is better, for a moment... Meanwhile all of the guests are exiting the sanctuary like someone has just thrown a grenade in there. My "husband" picks me up in the hug and twirls me around, my dress swirls and I'm thinking what a great photo op this would be, but I see no photographers around. He sets me down and suddenly I realize that he is wearing what I can only assume is a Court Jester costume minus the hat. He is wearing a white undershirt with a black vest with bright red trim. The pants are black but look extremely worn, and have the elastic around the ankles like the old 80's pants. He has on white socks which are extremely obvious due the the elastic bunching above his ankles and black shoes of some sort. My mouth gapes as I ask if that is what he wore for the ceremony (because I don't remember). He says no, he just thought he'd put it on for now and acts put off that I would be commenting on his apparel. Bewildered with my mouth gaping he distracts me by saying I look pretty. I look down at my dress and realize it was never pressed. My "hubby" leans down and starts trying to help me fix it because everything is bunched and wrinkled. I realize that the dress is way too long and I'm tripping on it and when I stick one of my feet out of the skirt I realize I am wearing old lady loafers and the thickest nylons I have ever seen in my life. At this point complaining is pointless. My shoulders slouch as I realize I'm just going to have to accept all of this.
Now we are still in the back lobby of the church but on the other side of us is now a strip mall with tons of restaurants like Blimpie, a hot dog shop etc. Suddenly exhausted I look at my new "husband" in his court jester costume and realize he is mad at ME. Somehow we have gotten into a fight, that which I do not remember either, and for some reason I decide to pinch him really hard because at the moment that seems like the most sane thing to do. He gets very mad and threatens to pinch me much harder and we are left arguing in the church "lobby" with the strip mall across the street and cars zipping by, him in a court jester costume, me in my too long wrinkled dress and loafers, all the guests have run away and the church is empty.....
I wake up thrashing in my bed screaming "NO!!!!" Once I wake up I lay there clutching my comforter in a cold sweat realizing it was just a dream, and then spend the next half hour trying to figure out how I can prevent all of those things from happening. At this point I can only pray for insomnia...
